I have had plenty of trouble with the Department of Social Welfare in the past. For a period of five months when I was on the dole almost two years ago, the department seemed to be going out of their way to piss me off at ever turn. I was without a penny for the first two months of this period because that was how long it took them to process my application. Luckily enough, I was then living with my parents, and surviving on their eternal benevolence. Had I been anywhere else, I would have been reduced to eating cardboard and sleeping in doorways. Then payments began to arrive, but were a paltry €35 a week, which wouldn't even have kept me in good quality cardboard. That 3-ply stuff, you know.
After moving out of my parents house and starting to look for a job in earnest, I anticipated a marked increase in unemployment benefit, what with having to pay rent and, well, buy things. However, it turned out that civil servants in the capital are a lot more brutal and thorough-going than in the country. I was hauled in for an interview, and then told I wouldn't receive full benefit because I was living with my girlfriend. After explaining that we had just moved in, and were living with other people, I was told in no uncertain terms that I would have to be means tested under the same criteria as a married man. I was completely shocked, not to say angried at this development, and remember bickering at length with the unwavering civil servant about definitions of common law marriage and co-habitation. The argument threatened to turn into a discussion about my sexual activity at any moment. I can just imagine filling out a form in triplicate: "Monday, 11am. Felt slight genital stirring while watching The Dukes of Hazzard. Encounter with Daisy and her hotpants was unconsummated".
The outcome of this was that I was docked about €70 each week. I then had a brilliant scheme where I went to the dole office about two weeks later, and told them I had broken up with my girlfriend. So, I didn't wash or shave for a few days, drank a lot of booze and went to the office, looking like a complete mess. They seemed sympathetic and said they would make the necessary changes. I left elated, delighted at how I had beaten the system, and celebrated by having a shower, and then drinking some more booze. A few days later, I was finally enjoying my unemployment, lazing around on the couch without having to go for fake interviews, or spend hours sitting in the dole office. I may even have been watching the Dukes of Hazzard, when I heard a knock at my door. It was a dole inspector who had come to inspect my living arrangements. Obviously enough, I was scuppered because I was still living with my girlfriend. I was gutted and chastened, and since then have been very reluctant to answer the door to anybody.
Not long after that I got a job, but harboured a very great grudge against the department, to whom I was now having to pay tax. The reason I brought this up was that their iron boot has once again fallen in my path. I've been trying to claim some back rent relief, which I am definitely owed, but those bastards have thrown a spanner into every possible gap, and a simple procedure that should have taken a week, has been dragged out now to six weeks, with their latest ludicrous demand (of all of my dole receipts) coming today. So, it's a cautionary tale, really, and one I have heard echoed by many other people. No matter how many angles you think you've covered, they will inevitably find something to screw you with. Is it any wonder I'm so bitter?
After moving out of my parents house and starting to look for a job in earnest, I anticipated a marked increase in unemployment benefit, what with having to pay rent and, well, buy things. However, it turned out that civil servants in the capital are a lot more brutal and thorough-going than in the country. I was hauled in for an interview, and then told I wouldn't receive full benefit because I was living with my girlfriend. After explaining that we had just moved in, and were living with other people, I was told in no uncertain terms that I would have to be means tested under the same criteria as a married man. I was completely shocked, not to say angried at this development, and remember bickering at length with the unwavering civil servant about definitions of common law marriage and co-habitation. The argument threatened to turn into a discussion about my sexual activity at any moment. I can just imagine filling out a form in triplicate: "Monday, 11am. Felt slight genital stirring while watching The Dukes of Hazzard. Encounter with Daisy and her hotpants was unconsummated".
The outcome of this was that I was docked about €70 each week. I then had a brilliant scheme where I went to the dole office about two weeks later, and told them I had broken up with my girlfriend. So, I didn't wash or shave for a few days, drank a lot of booze and went to the office, looking like a complete mess. They seemed sympathetic and said they would make the necessary changes. I left elated, delighted at how I had beaten the system, and celebrated by having a shower, and then drinking some more booze. A few days later, I was finally enjoying my unemployment, lazing around on the couch without having to go for fake interviews, or spend hours sitting in the dole office. I may even have been watching the Dukes of Hazzard, when I heard a knock at my door. It was a dole inspector who had come to inspect my living arrangements. Obviously enough, I was scuppered because I was still living with my girlfriend. I was gutted and chastened, and since then have been very reluctant to answer the door to anybody.
Not long after that I got a job, but harboured a very great grudge against the department, to whom I was now having to pay tax. The reason I brought this up was that their iron boot has once again fallen in my path. I've been trying to claim some back rent relief, which I am definitely owed, but those bastards have thrown a spanner into every possible gap, and a simple procedure that should have taken a week, has been dragged out now to six weeks, with their latest ludicrous demand (of all of my dole receipts) coming today. So, it's a cautionary tale, really, and one I have heard echoed by many other people. No matter how many angles you think you've covered, they will inevitably find something to screw you with. Is it any wonder I'm so bitter?
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